This is one of those times of year when I wonder why I live here and at the same time I am reminded exactly why we live here. The mighty Red River of the north is on the rise again. The river is expected to crest between 39 and 40 feet on Sunday. In 2009 we had a record crest of 40.8 feet. That was a terrifying time...we had to leave our new home. The communities of Fargo/Moorhead came together and fought, literally, for our lives. Last year, we battled again. The rise has slowed, but from Tuesday to Thursday, the river rose 8 feet.
So, we live here because it is a true community. The high school students are a huge help in this fight--they are bussed from the schools to wherever they are needed and they throw sandbags. If you go here http://youtu.be/3qsmjLDvZfA you can get a glimpse of the fight.(Hope that works, I couldn't figure out how to put the video up here like it was on FaceBook).
I thought I was handling this years flood OK, but I have found myself in tears several times today and eating anything that gets in my way.
I belong to a mom's group at my church. Today, the discussion somehow turned to shyness. I got up my courage and spoke about how shy I am-even in that group (8-10 moms). I told the group that I often want to say something, but am too shy and how just the thought of speaking makes my heart pound. (I do suffer from Generalized Anxiety). One of the other mom's piped up and said, "It's the Holy Spirit prompting you". This same mom e-mailed me shortly after she got home and told me that what I say does matter, that I what I have to say may be just what another mom needs to hear at that time. I love that. So next time I want to say something and my heart starts pounding I will try to remember that I NEED to speak up...the Holy Spirit is calling.
The Girl got in a car accident today. No one was hurt, thank God! We had a winter storm Tuesday into Wednesday morning....school was canceled (for the first time this school year) due to poor road conditions on wed. I warned her the roads were icy. She was following a city bus, sun was in her eyes, the bus stopped at a bus stop. She was able to stop without hitting the bus, the boy behind her slid, and stopped, but the driver behind him slid into him causing him to slide into her. The woman driver was driving with a suspended license.
I was on my way home from taking The Boy to school when my cell phone rang. Yes, I answered it while driving because I knew it was The Girl and I knew it couldn't be good. I had just finished saying a prayer for her safety when the phone rang.
I already had a fear of winter driving. I've struggled all winter with anxiety over any of us driving. The roads were finally dry and then we got hit AGAIN.
I feel alone. I need to talk to someone. I can't burden my dearest friend as she has so much on her plate right now. I don't want to talk to my mom because I don't want her to worry. Some days I'd like to turn in my notice, but who do you turn your notice into when your employer is your family and God? Guess I just pray for more strength.
My emotions are heightened by the news that Leaving by Karen Kingsbury is out and one of the characters is based on my friend Roberta who died in November after a hard battle with leukemia. She is listed as a survivor in the book....I guess it went to print before November.
Isn't blogging supposed to make one feel better? Still waiting.
I took The Boy for a recheck at the pediatrician. He increased the dosage of his meds. On the way home my son told me there's nothing wrong with him, he just hates school and there's nothing I can do to change that.
We have challenged him to get C's or better this trimester. He seems to think he can't do it, but so far, so good...he's got C's. I'm hoping that when he sees he can do it, his attitude will change.
I have "gone back to school". I am determined to be able to help The Boy with math....a topic I struggled with all through school. My husband and daughter are very good at math, but they get frustrated helping The Boy so, I bought Basic Math and Pre-algebra for Dummies to help refresh my memory. I am still struggling.....I think some brains were just not meant to do math. I. Will. Not. Give. Up. Even though it's challenging, it's kinda fun.
WOW! Since my last post, a lot has happened.
>My parents came from IN for Christmas. They almost weren't able to make it home due to multiple blizzards.
>I've had an MRI on my shoulder...thinning tendon....whatever that means. Physical Therapy did no good. I plug along at the exercises and have some good days and some bad days.
>I reconnected with a Mom's group at my church. It's a great bunch of ladies and I can ALWAYS count on laughing Wednesday mornings.
>We (my dog and I) suffered through 3 weeks of workmen in and out as drywall was put up and taped and textured. I painted it a beachy/sky blue-very soothing. Followed by more men laying carpet in our now finished basement. OK, we still have to put in baseboards, but that will have to wait until spring when I can finish them in the garage.
>I finished a Double Irish Chain quilt top. Now I just have to figure out how I want to quilt it.
>Our son has been diagnosed with depression. That's been hard. It's only thanks to a phone call from one of his teachers that we took him to see a pediatrician. I was convinced he had ADD. He may, but the doctor thought we needed to get the depression under control first. It did not present as what I would call "typical" depression. He ( a teen boy) simply shuts down and avoids people. He's never seemed sad at home. I've struggled with guilt. Is it my fault? How could I not see it? Did I give him crappy genes (depression runs in my family)? He's been on medication for 2 weeks now and I'm not really seeing any results, but it can take as long as 6 weeks to kick in. Then there's the fear of side effects of anti-depressants on teens.
>We are preparing for yet another, possibly record breaking, spring flood. Who, in their right mind, would live in a dried up glacial lake bed? I. Do. Not. Know. Guess we're not in our right minds- lol.
>I've taken to knitting socks as therapy for all that's going on....hurts my shoulder though. I just grin and bear it.